Sunday, October 16, 2016

Global Warming and Atrophied Brains of Tree-Huggers

Just as I thought.  It really might be a communist plot

Remember way back in the dark recesses of the 1980's and 1990's when hairspray and aerosol deodorant was on the brink of exterminating mankind by depleting the ozone layer?

Luckily for all of us those aerosol gasses were banned and replaced with HFC (hydrofluorocarbons).  It was especially fortunate for the manufacturers of much more expensive and less effective gas to propel silly string and keep Bartles and Jaymes cool.

As it turns out, however, the best intentions of those mush-for-brains tree-huggers and lefty pinkos have ended up killing the planet with Global Warming.  Climate Change is now deemed to be caused by the not-so-hot air spewing from the canned air used to blow Doritos crumbs off keyboards.

Now that I'm on a roll, recall when we got those great heavy-duty brown paper bags for our groceries at Albertsons?  They were banned as well in an effort by sandal-wearing granola-munching hippies to save the planet.  Now, the replacement plastic bags are being banned my the next-generation (once removed) millennial morons in an effort to save the planet.

Geezus! Bring back the Unknown Comic.

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